Friday, August 7, 2009

Peeking Through The Gray

During the past few days I feel like I am peeking through the gray of grief. Grief to me feels like a GIANT cloud. I know there is land, I know there is sunshine, I know there is beauty, but I just see gray.

After some much needed time alone with God, I think I feel myself peeking through the gray every once in awhile. I still feel myself being overwhelmed by little things that didn't use to cause me a second moment's thought. Yet, I have days that are productive and even purposeful.

The title of this blog keeps me honest. It really is a choice to have a great life. I am choosing to live my days on purpose and with great character. Part of great character I believe is to know and admit your weaknesses and be honest with yourself and those around you.

For any of my family, you already know this, but my greatest weakness is communication. I am so day-to-day focused, task-oriented that relationships and communication are a weakness. It's not a lack of love or interest, it is just a weakness. I am going to work on being better with this. I think I'm going to have to make lists...LOL.

Anyway, today mom has been on my mind a lot. I got my hair done, and she would just love it. I can just hear her say, "Well I'm sure its pretty but not as pretty as me." Oh how I miss her. We got some GREAT news in our family today. She would be thrilled. I'm sure she new before we did, but nevertheless it would have been great to talk to her about it.

1 comment:

  1. You amaze me so much Rachelle! Your courage and honesty as you get through each day without your mom is such an inspiration. You have always inspired me-probably more than you'll ever know...I'm so proud to know you and call you my sister:) I love you so much & am praying for you today & everyday!