Today has been a wonderful day. I felt like myself today. I was able to multi-task. I enjoyed a GREAT day at church. I worked on things from my computer while the kids practiced guitar and played the wii. I organized a sleepover and had a training call while feeding crazed neighbor kids pizza. I like to multi-task. I like to feel like my day has been productive.
Then as I settle down to get ready to jump in my bath tub, I think "I'd love to tell mom today was a good day." The boys are so happy, smiling and loving God. Carder called Papaw today and his first question was, "So, how was your church today?"
I am so proud of them. I just want to share the goodness with her too. There are not many people besides your mom that you can brag about your children to. So while I felt great today, as I am typing tears are just rolling down my cheeks.
Will the ache ever lessen? Funny, in a weird sort of way I hope that it doesn't. Yet in another way, I really need to have more days that I can function in a normal way. How does life ever even out? Or does it?
Living in such a way that there are no regrets means living it to the fullest. Now, my fullest means tears are normal...I guess that is the new normal everyone keeps talking about.
I'm sure it will never get "easier..." just more manageable. You did seem more like "Rachelle" on Sunday. Productivity is always a good thing for us ladies on the go! I'm so excited for you to have a little getaway the next couple of days and am sure that will be wonderful as well! Praying for you today & everyday!
ReplyDeletePS_You can always brag to this PROUD aunt about your boys:) We love them to pieces!!